They passed. My hands didn’t, “provoke the desired emotional aesthetic”… which is code for, “The peacock finger placement and harsh lighting that your photographer – Anton – pushed on you ended up robbing your hands of their healthy hue and masculinity that we so desire.” So there was only four things to do:
1. Hand tan
2. Break into Anton’s studio
3. Take my own self hand portraits
4. Submit the new test shot to my agent
I think you’ll agree that the new shot has more of a strong, masculine flair that projects vitality and fine motor skills.